Can't wait. Been getting back into the game recently.
This is rather cool...
Well a week later and I still think what the... aspirational target?!
If someone says I should do something I'll say, "It was a aspirational target".
It is essentially meaningless, nothing in it is productive. Calls for more ways to reach targets without proposing a target or proposing ways to reach it.
Even though I'm not depressed anymore I find myself in the repercussion of it, trying to find a way out, reorganizing my life and its direction.
In the past I have had to deal with my underlying depression myself as there is never someone I wish to burden. So I tend to drift away from those around me often. I know running away from my troubles is not the best way to deal with things but it works well for me.
I changed degree at my university after my second year, I took advantage of a oversight in the system and started doing it during my second year. It was something I was meant to do at the beginning but a poor decision led me to go down the wrong way. Yet this mistake made me realise what I wanted to do.
This was the happiest time of my uni life, had friends to share my time with, applied for the degree change. It was all working out perfectly for my next (third) year. Then things around me began to collapse... betrayed by a whole group of friends over a girl. Then betrayed by that girl and the remaining friends I had, only months later. Left to pick up the pieces the wind then blew them in my face.
My application was approved for the degree change preceding my third year. No one was there for me to be happy with, what I once hoped to achieve went by insignificant. I tried to keep myself going by continuing and initially things went well, but as days passed memories were still etched in the walls. Each day they would still be read and each day became less days.
I changed campus and studied a unit in another degree but my attempt to do even a single unit of old failed to the point all were failed.
Another uni or college would mean I would have to start again and I would've wasted the last 6 years since high school. I can't go back now. I can't.
I need to look forward and close that chapter, stop looking back. It still hurts... and it will always hurt yet all I can do is live with it and accept that. I have already chosen and seen death, life is more painful.
No one should go though what I went through. I am not cruel enough to wish that upon you.
As I look towards the sky, rain begins
running down my face, lost within the haste,
It's time to say goodbye.
A map of the world, I can't find
where I... exist now. I lack faith in this world...
I am used, unappreciated and punished for nothing within reason
HATE prejudgment and disrespect where none has been forthcoming to them
PEOPLE can goto hell to expect me to still show them my respect in return.
Those who don't treat people how they themselves want to be treated are hypocrites to the 10th degree.
WHY HAS IT
BEEN LIKE THIS
THROUGHOUT MY TIME
Is it because I'm the quite one, you think that I don't care or I won't react. I'll show you otherwise...
IF YOU CAN'T
You are was asking for, a awakening, that you've never seen before. You will find why to FEAR IT...
My god the most RANDOM thing happened tonight/this morning. After work was at Penrith Macca's 3am it was the usual, chating, eating, cleaners doing there thing...
A bald Caucasian guy in a sky blue top walks in and begins to throw a few punches and even puts in a knee to the cleaner (middle eastern) emptying the rubbish bin near the entrance. My seat was facing towards it so I know It was totally unprovoked while the cleaner was just doing his job. The scuffle only lasted 5 seconds till the attacker walked out and pissed off. The cleaner didn't have the chance to retaliate likely from the pure surprise and randomness of it all. The rest of us in that time only had the chance to realise what was going on. I only managed to slide across the seat towards the isle. As the attacker left and walked past the window I eye contacted the guy brefiely then glanced his shirt which had something odd words printed on it, which I didn't manage to pick up as he past behind the wall.
Backtracking in my mind, he wasn't the only one there as earlier another bald or shaved Caucasian in a brown top sat on the windowsill for at least 5 mins before and never came in. I made eye contact with that guy too in a moment he looked inside towards us. Thinking about it after the fact, it seemed as if they were checking the place out, waiting for a suitable target. This second guy being a witness for the other.
The first thought that popped into my mind was the film Romper Stomper. The white supremest type of guys in that film. They match the look 100% and the style of attack matches the behaviour.
Things like this just shows how f**ked up people are. So if anyone ever wondered why I hate Penrith so much this is one of the reasons. The area is so Caucasian filled with whores, sluts and OC wanna be's. Guys with their 'done-up' ute's, Holden's, Ford's, all provided by their parents and through none of their own effort. Retards.
Just got back from work, I'm so so tired.
A can of drink is 375ml a box has 36 of them that is 13.5 litres. A pallet has 60 boxes which is 810 litres (CocaCola is 900 litres, 24 a box, 100 boxes). I pull it about 100m and I do it for about 5-10 pallets. While also taking each box off the pallet one or two at a time. The weight itself is somewhere under a tonne, my estimate would be 800kg a pallet.
During one of my late nights last week, this popped into my head and I had to draw it out.
Meanwhile back at the batcave *sfx* I pre-ordered the Pangya Erika figure just listed on HLJ I presume it's Hana under the Albatross18 name changes since there is no picture yet. I need or well want cookies (premium game currency) too so I can get diving goggles for Kooh and some other small items. Early tonight I also made my first Toma Hole in One (WizWiz hole 4) and then again a few games later (NorthWiz hole 9), a good night for me. (^_^)
Also the case for my new phone I mentioned last post arrived along with the matching one for a future DS lite. *molests*
( Case Pic + Hole In OneCollapse )
Whoa... man... the door behind me is doing crazy exorcist shite. When I look at it from this seat it looks like it is constantly opening yet isn't. Like it is swaying open in the wind but weirdly it doesn't sway close. From other angles and up close it's definitely stationary.
This is freaking me out... I'm going to go to bread.
Many days have passed since my last post. It's been a very weird week for me with my sleep all over the place. I decided I needed to have a defence attorney represent me...
Friday, 4th August: Witness Testimony
Decided to go out that afternoon to meet up with onizuneko at work, look at the recent Sony Ericsson K800i mobile and then proceed to hang out later that night.
Rather then just looking at the phone I ended up walking out with it, a rather random purchase helped with the fact it has a 3.2MP Cybershot camera. Phone added to court record // See below. So now I have a 3G phone on the 3 network, still with the same number as I've always had. I also ordered a made to order case for it, made out of the same material used in a kimono obi. Also ordered one to fit a Nintendo DS Lite so it matches (for when I do get a Lite). Hopefully it should arrive in the next few days. So that was about it that day.
TAKE THAT: Beret
What's this? Oh, yes the beret. Well after meeting onizuneko we proceeded to pick up tux_masaki and then drop by mayuki_miyazawa's place to return the beret that was left behind. After that we had Sri Lanken for dinner and that's about it really.
Saturday, 5th August: Witness Testimony
Went to kawaii_no_miko's birthday after dinner activities. Wasn't able to make dinner due to money and time. onizuneko and I meet up with everyone at the French Riviera ice cream parlor, then we went to Karaoke for 2 hours and ended up finishing at about 2.30am. Photo's added to court record // Download
Wednesday, 9th August: Autopsy Report
Victim died by lack of sleep at around 3-3.5hrs. Went to university that day for Japanese 102 spread over 7 hours imediatly followed by work adding another 7 hours of physical essersion to an already tiresome day. Victim mostly slept the next few days.
Saturday, 12th August: Sequence of Events
15.00 Woke to find them self in a empty house.
16.05 Played Albatross18 for a bit with new Cat Ears for Kooh.
17.00 Phone calls received and plans of timing are made for onizuneko's birthday dinner.
17.20 Preparations are made for departure.
17.35 Depature commenced by vehicle as driver.
18.10 Arrival at onizuneko's house to also meet with t8_steve, mayuki_miyazawa, cooked_sashimi, ruri_strife, tux_masaki.
19.00 Dinner at Kenny's Fusion Restaurant.
21.15 EasyWay is had by some. Followed by the first casualty's of the night.
22.00 Remainder head to The Epping Pub for drinks to be joined by slykura.
25.00 Night comes to a end.
Surveillance photos added to court record // Download
Turnabout Week, End of Chapter One.